Thought conveyance portal.

Words dude…

I am full of it.. I mean them!!  Isn’t funny just when we think we have it all figured out a day comes at us that makes us go..hmmm?  or Hurumph!! 
    Yesterday was my day, I felt lonesome but couldn’t understand for who or what.  I needed to talk, but to who about what??  People were talking to me and still I felt like no one was paying attention (drama queen LOL jk I think I was okay).  I think I needed to have the right conversation, to say the right words, to talk about the right topic, have someone ask me the right questions. 
     Today is a different day.. I woke up in a better frame of mind.  I believe it is because after the bday party I was at, on the drive home I connected with the one I needed too.  He knows my mind better than I.  Just rambling on about what ever till I get to the issue helps, and sometimes I keep rambling right past it, but I feel better   Just don’t know why.  I like to sing, in tune out of tune who am I to judge (tone deaf sometimes).  The words I sing are not found in lyrics but in life, I sing my thoughts..which can make for some silliness or seriousness, but I relax.  I have done this while walking through town (secretly praying everyone is asleep, and half not caring anyway) or in the country.  I feel I connect with God this way, I am honest with Him about where, who and what I am at that moment in time.  He knows it all anyway, but it feels better to tell someone then as well, I think He appreciates me being honest too. 
     It is how I have kept sane all these years..  HEY that is not nice!! jk  I am SANE.. truly I am!  I just fell out of the habit of doing it, but I need to slide back into it.   Hey and thanks to those who let me ramble yesterday.  Even if it was only for a few sentences, and thanks to those who have spoiled me over the last year..Now I think every conversation is about me THANKS A LOT!!  jk  I have been given lots of attention, but I think I need to realize we have been sharing attention, so POP..there goes that swelled head of mine..  reality kicks in.. And it is great (gotta wear shades it is blazing hot here in the north country)
After all it is not all about me!!   (not all of it…)


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